My wife and I went out to a local community event last weekend for a couple of hours. Just the two of us. The kids, now 12 & 15, didn’t want to come. They stayed home. It was both great and also a stark realisation that we’re in a new stage of parenting. One that I remember more clearly from my childhood than the early years.
So, I’ve been speaking to parents whose kids are in their 20’s to understand what they’d do differently if they could go back to being parents of teens. The theme that keeps coming back is –
‘Make the most of it because you’ll see less and less of them until they want something or need a lift somewhere.’
I was hoping for something a little more profound or at least practical. Hey ho. But it has made me reflect on the past stages of parenting, and while I have some regrets I’m pretty at ease with the path I took. And as I walk forward into this new stage, I know now I get to do things I want to do for myself. The things that I felt frustrated about not being able to do in the earlier stages. And although the moments of connection with my kids are fewer, they are… just wonderful. As this post I saw on socials illustrates –
Daughter and I used to talk in a made up alien language when she was little. She grew out of it and it crushed me. I picked her up after she’d been on a night out. She started doing it again while drunk and we sat for an hour in the car and it is the happiest I’ve felt in years.